A while ago I wrote about my job and how I was learning to balance work, home, and fun.
I’ve learned the lesson, except it’s not quite the way I envisioned learning it: I quit my job.
I’m not in any way suggesting that everyone has to do what I ended up doing in order to find balance; heck, given a different job, I’m not sure that *I* had to do what I did in order to find balance. But life is what it is and honestly, I’m not sure I would do it differently if given the chance for a do-over.
The job was always interesting, always busy. I never (ever) stopped from the time I logged in until I signed off for the day – most days I never took lunch, either. A bad precedent, I’m aware, but such is life. I wanted to make a good impression and give my all for the company. I did that – and for the first several months, all was well in the work-world.
However, all was not well in my home. I was getting sick (weakened immunity from constant stress) and I was finding that I was becoming someone that I simply didn’t want to be around. I was grouchy, stressed-out, and I didn’t find joy in the normal things I do for my family – like experimenting with cuisine, chores & organization, and having fun with them spontaneously. I dreaded the start of the work-week and began to resent homeschooling – and the latter really, really bothered me.
Through a confluence of events, I got sick, took 1-½ sick-days, and heard God clearly tell me that I was neglecting my first responsibility and priority: my family. The second sick day, I found myself homeschooling our son (because unless I’m dying, school must go on) and actually *enjoying* it. Which meant that I had begun to resent it because it encroached on my work-day, not because the actual educating of my child was untenable to me. This was GOOD news.
And so I told my husband what I needed to do: quit. And I did.
I achieved a goal for us as a family during the few months I worked – I paid off one entire credit card. I was pretty stinkin’ happy and proud of myself with this accomplishment, and the debt-snowball continues. I didn’t want to lose steam on our debt chunk-down, but I also realized that my family couldn’t be sacrificed in the process of achieving my goal. And so when people asked me “What are you going to do?” I was able to answer honestly: I don’t know. But I wasn’t worried. I truly believed that God honours the desire to get out of debt and that He would bring opportunities my way in the meantime.
Just like clockwork, opportunities have been coming my way. I’m writing for a few other outlets and clients now (you can also find me at The English Tea Store Blog and The Taste of English Tea). I’m also in the process of setting up my photography studio and working on my business site at the same time and have enjoyed shooting at every opportunity. I’m content to let these opportunities come as they will and am enjoying my renewed existence here at home.
It took working my heart and soul out for a company to remind me what I really enjoy doing and how blessed I really am. We’ve made huge sacrifices to allow me to be at home, to homeschool, and to have time to experiment with gardening, sewing, baking, canning, etc. I don’t want to minimize those sacrifices or try to sell a bill of goods that says it’s “easy” or “not a big deal.” It IS a big deal, but it’s also one that I took for granted and it took working full-time to allow me to remember exactly how much I like following my heart and being at home.
Dorothy was right: there really *is* no place like home. But I’ll skip the sequined shoes.